Pretend

strange oh so strange 

when it feels better being alone 

you accept there is no body else and set it in stone....

and then you came along

your complexion was so sad and strong

you make me believe once again that I could be wrong

They told me maybe she's crazy a little like you
Everyone said you were nothing but trouble and
All that I know is that I've never been here before
And no, I'll never leave, if it's alright with you
Dreaming of oceans while jumping in puddles and
All of my life I pretend you where there by the door
I don't need to pretend any more.

 Scott Porter and The Glory Dogs - Pretend

When I first time hearing this song in Bandslam, I liked it on the spot. It sounds so good, and the words are fit to hear.But most of all, I was attracted at the title itself and the last line 'I don't need to pretend anymore'. Yes, I'd like that, when we don't have to pretend for anything.

We human, especially Malay, love to pretend. We pretend to impress someone. We pretend to be someone else. We pretend to hide something rotten simply because we don't want to make a fuss out of it. We pretend not to hear something bad about ourselves when our friends talk about it because we are too scared of losing them. We pretend to like someone for the sake of a friendship even though he was the one who always make  fun of us and hurt us the most. Admit it. We are pretenders. 

And most of the time I'm in Nilai, I pretended. This time, I pretend to be someone else who I'd never be just for the sake of being accepted. 'You are now a university student. you should act mature unlike when you're in school', a friend once told me. I followed that and it was a regret. I should realize this from the beginning; the  key of being accepted is be who you really are. That was what I did in SBPIK and it remains the best moment in my life.

Back on the topic, yes, I'd really like it when I don't need to wear this mask of disguise anymore. Time for my metamorphosis.